Friendship Illusions

One things about the internet, is that it creates an illusionary world that is easy to believe in. It tells us about all the amazing adventures, great times and tons of friends that other people are having while we are failing to achieve the same. There is a very real risk of comparing ourselves to these illusions and believing that we are some how falling short or failing in life.

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Matter

1. Matter,  as distinct from mind and spirit, is a broad word that applies to anything perceived, or known to be occupying space: solid matter; gaseous matter.
2. to be of importance; signify

www.dictionary.com

It is interesting that we use the same word to identify that something has substance and that it has meaning. Inherent in our language is the suggested value that all things that exist have meaning. This single shared meaning, suggestiong that simply existing equates with holding meaning and thus, having value.

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Prevelence

Let me present you with some startling statistics.

Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome (POTS) occurs in about ten percent of the population. This disease occurs at the same rate as Diabetes Mellitus (DM).

On average, a patient sees seven doctors before they are diagnosed with POTS. This means they get an incorrect diagnosis seven times before receiving the correct diagnosis. While many patients with DM go undiagnosed for a long period due to mild or no symptoms, they usually only see a single doctor to get the correct diagnosis.

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030921

I find myself at a strange place emotionally.

Years ago, my sister, Toadie, suggested that I might have autism. At the time, I completely dismissed her suggestion. Honestly, I didn’t even give the idea any real consideration. I’m not sure why, but at the time, the idea didn’t seem pausable. Perhaps because I was stuck in the mode of thinking about autism in context of childhood, male presentation. Perhaps because I was hung up on the idea that those with autism have some sort of speech delay or other vocal imapirment. Which I don’t have.

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The Myth of Purpose

I frequently hear people say that you need to “find your purpose” and “pursue your passion” in order to be happy in life. These ideas are fraught with problems.

First, passion is an emotion and like all emotions will wax and wane. You will never feel passionately about anything all the time. Believing that any emotion, let alone strong emotions (like passion) can be sustained over long periods is just unrealistic and will lead to disappointment.

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Stupid Little Imp

Rejection Sensivity Dysphoria (RSD) is an evil nagging imp that rides on your shoulder and lies to you about everything. It tells you that everyone around you is judging you poorly. It tells you that you are not good enough. It tells you that you don’t measure up when compared to others. It tells you that you need to be perfect in order to acheieve any kind of success. It tells you that you are impossible to love because you are not worthy of being loved.

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