Sense of Justice

What’s your favorite thing about yourself?
-WordPress Prompt

Hello Dazzle! Thanks for coming and hanging out with me today, I’m glad that you are here. Today I wanted to talk about my sense of justice. It is a fairly well established idea that those of us with autism have a strong sense of justice [1] [2] [3] and I am no exception to this. While this has been one of the traits that has caused me a great deal of difficulties through out my life, it is the trait that I am the most proud of having.

What does it mean to have a strong sense of justice? Well, according to the research [1] [2] the difference isn’t in the ability to tell the difference between what is right and wrong but rather the person’s degree of willingness to forgo personal gain to do what is considered right. This means that those of us with autism will do what we believe is right even when it means that we will face negative consequences.

Whether or not having a strong sense of justice is a positive or negative trait is still up for debate. Those who consider it a positive trait consider it a prosocial behavior that puts the greater good before the self. Those who consider it a negative trait consider it a self sabotaging behavior that often leads to negative personal outcomes. I’ve personally come to the conclusion that it is really both. Having a strong sense of justice is a double edged sword that cuts deeply in both directions. It has allowed me to accomplish a great deal, but it has also cost me a great deal.

Why is it the trait that I am the most proud of and the thing that I feel is the most defining part of who I am? This strong sense of justice has become a central aspect of my nursing career and has allowed me to become a powerful patient advocate. Because I have always been driven to do what I believed was right, I never hesitated to stand up for my patients’ rights even when that meant going up against a doctor or my nursing supervisors. It is this trait that has allowed me to provide the high quality of care that I have through out the years and I am really proud of having done that.

But it hasn’t come without cost. Challenging the decisions of those you work with means that you are not a popular co-worker and that can make your work environment rather difficult. It means that there are times that you are seen as being “difficult” or “stubborn” by those that you work with. I have been accused of being overly rigid when adhering to rule sets. All of this makes for a lot of conflict with others that is stressful and difficult to manage. But more then all of that, it means that you are the social outsider and that is really hard.

For a long time, I struggled with the negative consequences of my sense of justice and often felt that this sword was too heavy. Yet I was never able to put it down. That sword is a fundamental part of who I am. It is an extension of my arm rather then something separate that I can choose to take up or set aside. This trait required that I master strong boundaries to protect myself. Not every cause can become my cause. Not every battle can compel me to fight. And with that balance, this is a mighty sword that I am proud to wield.

In the end, this trait means that there will be many people that don’t like me. I’m alright with that. The people that will fit best in my life are those that will understand the importance of justice in my life and will support me in my efforts to make this a better place for the majority rather then just myself. Because one thing that I have learned along the way is that there is no mask that you can wear and no action that you can take that will lead to everyone liking you. If I’m only going to be liked by a small group of people, I want them to be people of my true tribe; a tribe that understands justice.

Well, that’s about it for my rambling today. Thanks for coming and spending some time with me. If you like my rambling, click on that like button. It really does help! Until we talk again, you take care of yourselves!

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