Parenting the Neurodivergent

Hello, may zebras and spoonies! Thanks for coming in visiting with me today. I’m glad you are here.

Today I’m gonna be talking about ADHD. Big surprise. I know, right? Because when do I ever talk about that?

One of the things that I see parents of children with ADHD frequently ask in the support groups is what they can do to be better parents for children who have ADHD. And I’ll be honest, that in the support groups thus far, I have never answered this question. I’ve never felt like I had a good answer to this question. And I’ve spent a lot of time trying to think about what my parents could have done differently; could have done better to have given me a better start in life. And instead, I shifted it and started thinking about what it was in my childhood that marked me the most and gave me the most struggles as an adult. So I’m going to start my discussion there.

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Self-Honesty

When you have chronic illness, it becomes important to carefully self-evaluate and self-regulate. No one else can tell you if you should be resting or if you should be moving. No one else can really know if you are offering up excuses or if you are really having a bad pain day. But the truth is that it can be hard to tell the difference for ourselves at times. Why is this so hard? The answer comes down to self-honesty. Most of us tell ourselves lies without realizing that’s what we’re doing. We buy into the stereotypes or the stigma or the story about ourselves that we grew up with. 

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Stupid Little Imp

Rejection Sensivity Dysphoria (RSD) is an evil nagging imp that rides on your shoulder and lies to you about everything. It tells you that everyone around you is judging you poorly. It tells you that you are not good enough. It tells you that you don’t measure up when compared to others. It tells you that you need to be perfect in order to acheieve any kind of success. It tells you that you are impossible to love because you are not worthy of being loved.

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